What Is 'Fidget Spinner Porn?'

There are two answers to this. The first is that fidget spinner porn does not exist -- at least, it is not real porn. You may have heard of food porn, or word porn -- these terms simply refer to pictures of things that people like to look at: in these cases food and word art, respectively. The second answer is that fidget spinner porn is a very niche porn 'market' that has arisen to fill the gap in search-driven video arenas such as PornHub, where videos of fidget spinners doing decidedly asexual things (mostly, uh, spinning) have proliferated recently.

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So, here it is at long last -- a guide to fidget spinner porn, where you can find it, what it is, and whether the reality lives up to the hype. If you have never heard of fidget spinner porn before but we've piqued your interest, then read on now to find out for yourself just what on earth the fuss is really all about.

What The Heck Is A Fidget Spinner?

A fidget spinner is a kids toy that has taken over the world, if you go by sales figures alone. You can collect them, and they are available in a range of all colors, designs, patterns and various shapes. They were first made to target people with ADHD, kids who just could not sit still (that's most of them, then,) and compulsive fidgeters. Remember the old stress balls that people used to squeeze at their desk during a tough day at the office? The fidget spinner is the 21st century version of that. They have a central nub which you hold between your thumb and forefinger, and three nodes that spin around the hub, creating a blurred, moving disc. That is pretty much all there is to them. You can do various tricks with fidget spinners which has added to their appeal, but more about that later.

Do People Actually Have Sex With Fidget Spinners?

Well, yes. Sort of. The fact is that fidget spinner porn has grown out of what was at first a kind of jokey name for plain old boring videos of fidget spinners. You might have seen the videos of magic sand on Instagram, in which folk simply play with magic sand -- cut it half, squish it with their fingers, and so on. It's a fairly innocent, if rather odd, thing to witness, but there is a huge market for it out there. The fidget spinner 'porn' started out the same way, using the word 'porn' to just mean something enjoyable to watch, if embarrassing to admit to -- a guilty pleasure, if you will. But somehow actual porn sites started to host these videos, presumably making the mistake that they were actual real life porn -- the sex kind. If you watch some of these early non-sexual fidget spinner videos (try it if you suffer from insomnia, or just straight up hate yourself,) you will see that the videos simply show fidget spinners spinning -- nothing sexy about that at all. But some folk have tried to make good on the trend by making real fidget spinner porn -- and that really is porn. Basically, the fidget spinner is used to stimulate the clitoris. Does this have any enjoyable results? The videos seem to suggest so, but we will leave that up to you to judge.

What Is The Best Position For Fidget Spinner Sex?

With your head in your hands while you lament the demise of rational society. Just kidding. Any position in which there is easy access to the clitoris is fair game: bent over, laid on your back with your legs spread and you knees bent, standing with legs splayed... you know the drill. If you really want to know, there is no such thing as a good position for fidget spinner sex, because fidget spinner sex is not really a real thing. If you really need to have sex with a fidget spinner, then, well... we are sure you can probably figure out the best way to do it better than we can.

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Can You Hurt Yourself With Fidget Spinner Sex?

Left to their own devices, anyone bored enough can hurt themselves with pretty much anything. Many is the tale of the ER nurse who has had to remove a vacuum cleaner nozzle, a lightbulb, even a gerbil from somewhere that those things had no right to be. The best way to ensure that you do not hurt yourself while having sex with a fidget spinner would be to make sure that you do not have sex with a fidget spinner. There are so many sex toys out there that you can buy that will help get you off in ways that you might not have thought were humanly possible, so why not invest in one of them instead of potentially maiming your genitals with what is essentially a child's toy. Nobody ever treated Lego like this. Well, maybe people do -- it's a weird kinky world out there.

Fidget Spinner Porn: Is It A Fad?

Yes, of course it is. And it will go away soon if you stop looking at it. The truth is, lots of new crazes have sprung up over the years, from yo-yos to Frisbees, but there have been few such crazes that have some how spilled over into the word of porn in quite the way that the fidget spinner porn has done so. In fact, we can't really think of any at all. Is it a fad? The thing you need to ask, is are fidget spinners a fad. The fact is probably yes, fidget spinners are a fad. the trouble nowadays is that fads spread in ways that they never used to when the world was more localized. The modern culture of electronic interconnectedness has meant that a fad that may have run its course in a month or two now rolls around the world in waves. Social media, videos, blogs, and every other platform has been awash with these darned little gadgets that folk are for some odd reason totally obsessed with.

Why Fidget Spinner Porn Is Not Real Porn

What do you mean, it isn't real porn? Well, the fact of the matter is that not all porn was made equal. What qualifies as real porn? Really, it has to involve sex. The modern slang of using the word 'porn' to mean anything that is a guilty pleasure to watch or to look at has bled into the world of true porn, sparking a subculture that does not really exist. A few videos have sprung up to capitalize on the web traffic that is being driven by folk who genuinely just like watching films of actual fidget spinners doing nothing but spinning in a very non sexual manner. Sigh. The thing about fidget spinner porn, is that it was created by a divergence in the way in which we use words. Porn used to refer to sex, not to food, books, plants, or any other not-sexy thing. So you can blame semantics, which, frankly, it deserves.

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